Surviving twins

life lessons...

2011-08-11T10:03:00.000-07:00

dear Reader,
How the painful life lessons are... I wish I was the perfect person that I want to be. I wish I didn't' have to learn and grow anymore. For the growing brings very painful "growing pains". This week has taught me that I'm not as trusting in my own abilities as I thought. I didn't' realize that my ego was so fragile! It embarrasses me that I would even feel this way.

I have learned that not all inner thoughts should be shared, because those who love you will jump to your defense to protect you. Those you love you will want to do something to take the pain away, even if the pain is superficial.

How do I become and react the way I should? Why does the natural man/woman take over sometimes even despite your best intentions? When I'm in pain, i tend to hide and wait for it to pass...but others want to say my feelings for me. Its fine line to know when to be quiet and let the storm pass and when to say something. How do you know?

Relationships are very funny. Any good relationship, family or friends take a lot of hard work, understanding and forgiveness. Sometimes I lack in the forgiveness department. Sometimes i forget to turn the other cheek and realize that the person is not trying to harm or hurt me...they just don't see things how i see things.

Funny how when you've wronged someone it feels like you've committed a "sin". The wrong "hangs over your neck" like a huge stone that you desperately want to break free from. I hope that I can be a better person...I hope i can over come the "natural man". I hope i can see past my own feelings and think of others more than me. I hope to right the wrongs that have taken place. I hope that forgiveness is on both sides. I hope that those who have been hurt by my protector understand love for someone else can make you do and say things you would not normally. I hope that i can be the person next time in a situation like this that i can be proud of...I hope I have learned my lesson...I don't want to go through this again!!!

Kristen

Bieber Fever has offically hit our home!!!

2011-08-02T21:14:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader,

So Beiber Fever has finally hit our home...do I have a ten year old girl who is in love? Nope, I have a ten year old boy, who now wants to be Bieber!!! For the past two days he has spend almost all his waking hours watching the movie "Never, Say Never, and then practicing his hip hop dance moves. He's actually pretty good!!! I wake up in the morning hearing Bieber songs and go to bed with "Baby, Baby, Baby OHHHHH... I'm going a little crazy!

He is also wanting his hair to be long as well.. Too bad we just shaved it off for football! Hahaha. I love it...it giving me a taste of what is to come when my twin girls finally become this age. I cant' wait to take them to their first concert and hear them scream and cry like crazy girls. For the record I NEVER did this...I may have LOVED the New Kids on the Block but i kept all that craziness in side!!

Who was you childhood star crush???

Kristen

How does media affect/effect you??

2011-08-01T18:33:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader,

Today I started thinking about how watching different shows can affect how i think of my life. For example, yesterday I came across the show "keeping Up With the Kardashins" ( spelling?). After watching the show i noticed that i had this urge to "spend money", like getting my nails done, new clothes, etc. I didn't like the feeling. Then this morning as i lay in bed, (sick) i came upon a show called "Downsized". It's about a family who used to have a great income and was living the so called "American" dream. However, two years ago the husband lost his construction company and they were struggling to support seven kids. His wife was trying to start a new cleaning business. She spoke about how embarrassing it was to go from having a house cleaner two times a week to cleaning her friends homes.

The family showed how they were trying to cut all the extras things like, eating out, cable, sports clubs for kids, etc. They spoke about how this really helped them see the important things in life. How their kids were learning how to budget and how to work hard to earn money. The kids were also giving money to the parents to help out with things.

After watching this show, I had a much different feeling than after the first. This time, i felt so blessed that my husbands income is pretty steady, that we are able to afford sport clubs for our kids, that even though i coupon for groceries I do it for fun...for the challenge, not because i have too. It made me want to budget even more! To look for more ways to save! Aaron and I always talk about how we don't know what the future will bring...we are very aware that at any moment life could turn upside down.

I walked away from the show with so much gratitude! It was weird to realize how media affected me so much. It has taught me a very important lesson.. First no more freaking Kardashins...and be careful what i watch because the very thing on T.V can change how i feel about myself and my life.

How does Media affect you?

Kristen

Family gathering....

2011-07-18T21:47:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,

Summer brings many family gatherings, which I love and at times feel overwhelmed by. My husband comes from a family of 15 siblings...half's, step, and so on! It's so great to get everyone together but wow...we can make a real scene. Tonight the family went out to dinner and thankfully we had most of an out door patio, but i could still see people watching our crazy bunch. Kids running around, people eating and talking with loud voices...it was a great time.

Such gatherings make me thankful for the people i have in my life. With so much family come a lot of drama...but also the security of knowing that there is lots of support. It is wonderful for my own children to have so many cousins to play with and get to know.

Summer time family gatherings are even better than the holiday's because they are stress free! The late setting sun make the gatherings last long into the evening and we all go to bed totally exhausted! I'm loving summer time :)

Mama will you play with me???

2011-03-27T08:39:00.000-07:00

dear Reader, I hear this statement from my daughter Sydney at least a hundred times a day! I struggle with my answer. Do i play or do I do the many things that need to get down to run a successful household? Each time she ask my answer differs depending on what im doing that moment. Sometimes I can drop what I'm doing and spend time with her and others....well dinner will not cook itself!!! I am not a mom who plays with Barbies really well, I mean its not great conversation with a 3 1/2 year old...now doing a puzzle or a board game, I'm all over but alas...this girl loves to play with barbies or stuffed animals. My sisters love to see my "try" and play with those toys....like i said, I'm not very good with it. NOW my sister Michelle is a great "play with me mommy"...when she's not pregnant!!! ha ha During the summer it is she who is in the pool with her kids and mine while I lay out reading a book!!! We all have our strengths right! I think that if all my sisters and I were one person we would be perfect, Erica is the smart one, Michelle the playful, gorgeous one and I"m....crazy!!! So what will my answer by today when my daughter ask "Mama will you play with me?"...Well its Sunday so "Yes" baby....I will stretch my imagination and play with you!!!! But can we do a board game? Kristen

do your kids annoy you or is it just me?

2011-01-12T19:45:00.000-08:00

dear reader,

It has been one of those days...the one where i found myself crying a lot and wishing I was on some far away island. Lately i've been feeling guility about the fact that my kids annoy me!! Now the 9 year old is actually fine. It's the 3 1/2 old twins that drive me up the wall. Picture this: right now i have two very unhappy girls screaming in my face as I type because Daddy just told them it is time for bed. However, after he caused this ruckus he has now disappeared leaving me with kids screaming in my ear!

I love my kids I do! But i struggle with getting past how annoying it can be to be their mother!!! The whining, fighting, screaming, making unimaingale messes etc. are really getting to me. I'm hoping this is just a phase for me. I find myself wishing this time away and hoping for them to be five...i remember five was pretty cool with my son. But who knows...they are two drama filled girls.

The dilemma is that at the same time they are annoying me, i can still look at them and love them so stinking much. A simple hug, kiss or I love you from them just melts my heart.

i know children are a blessing....Uh...Lord...lets pour out some more JOY in Hoke house please +:)

Rainy Days...

2010-10-06T13:15:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader,
Life has gone on and this blog...well...hasn't. I haven't quite felt myself for the past few months. Things got very crazy, not like they weren't before with the twins..but I've been a bit off. With it now being my favorite time of the year, I"m starting to feel my old self come creeping back. I've haven't even done any creative writing for almost two months now and that's a very long time for me. I've basically been very burned out with life. I never understood how much being a mother was going to require of me! Plus, I never realized until now how much alone time I required!!! I guess that's why I'm a mom of three and not six!!!
Updates with twins, They are now both potty trained!!! I can't tell you how happy that makes me! They are busy with school and soccer, but i think soccer is on its way out because they don't play unless i"m on the field with them. and that is quickly getting old!!!! Okay I don't know what I pushed but can't get rid of the UNDERLINE!!!

I'm still on the all might quest to move my family to Utah! Too bad my eternal companion is not on the same page, which is okay, because i am very lucky to live where I do!! (but still love utah the best!

My book "multiply and replenish has finally been sent in for review with a publisher! It takes a few months to get a response so we will see.

I'm loving the rain we've had all week. For some this weather makes them depressed for me it makes my soul light! Nothing better in this world then writing and listening to the pouring rain outside!

kristen

potty training is for the BIRDS!!!

2010-07-21T16:32:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,

So the thing about twins is that even though they were born at the same time, they learn to do things at different times. For awhile it was Syd who did things first. She held her head up first, crawled first and walked first. Paige just seemed to be content with letting her "older sister" do things first. However, now things has switched gears as Paige has been potty trained for months now and Syd could careless about sitting in a pile of poop!!! I've tried talking to her, reasoning with her, though that's a hard thing to do with a three year old. When I tell her how yucky it is to sit in poop she just laughs at me!

I'm not at all worried that she isn't going to get it, i"m just so sick of diapers!!! I wish she would hurry it up, but i also am careful not to push her as I now that could be a disaster! But oh i wish she would just get a little spark of competition and want to be like her sister. :)

Kristen

What was I smoking last weekend???

2010-06-02T13:34:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,

For the Memorial Day weekend Aaron took Tyler up to a BYU sports camp. Since I was going to be home alone with the girls for four days, I decided I needed to go somewhere. I rounded up my sisters , their kids and mine and we headed to Palm springs. It was supposed to be a relaxing vacation in the sun. I should have known better...

Things got off to a great start when we were packed and ready to go only 2o minutes behind schedule. Really no big deal. We grabbed the kids some treats and hopped on the freeway by 12:20 pm. The freeway was free and clear and I felt a little smug about how smart we were being for leaving early on a Friday so that we didn't hit any of the weekend traffic. Then suddenly the freeway stopped and I hear my sister Michelle say. " Oh, yeah they mentioned something on the radio about the freeway being backed up." okay" I think, no problem. We'll have a little traffic and then be on our merry way. Fifteen minutes later it was clear that we were in some serious trouble. I checked the mirrors and decided to break away from the pack and cross over the yellow cones into the fast track lane. I was desperate! I had a car full of kids!! Again I thought we might be in the clear. The fast track was moving...well...FAST. But to my horror I saw brake lights ahead. It didn't take me long to realize they had shut the whole freeway down and we were being diverted off the highway!
Once we made it off the highway, McKenzie AND my sister both needed potty breaks. It had now been forty five minutes since we had left and we were still only a few miles from my home. I pulled into a gas station, hopped out and dragged McKenzie with me. it seemed that everyone else who was caught in the traffic had decided to have a "potty break" too. I tell Michelle, "she is just going to have to go on the side of the road! I'm not waiting in this, we need to get going!"
However, after much talking , Michelle convinced me it was better to wait for the bathroom to open up.
With everyone 'empty", we drove off in the direction of the freeway on side streets hoping to pass whatever obstacle was on the freeway. Needless to say after 20 minutes of driving around in circles we realized that none of the side streets went through. We completely turned around and decided to get back on the freeway going the opposite direction and make a big loop to get back to where we needed to be. Again, everyone else had the same idea!!! By the time we had been in the car for two hours, my sister called it quits. "Lets just get off, go back to the house and leave later tonight." At first I didn't want too. I was already here and i wanted to keep going but the kids were starting to go out of control so I consented.
The kids spent the rest of the late afternoon swimming in the pool while the moms pouted over the fact we should have been laying out by a pool at a beautiful hotel. To break up the time, we took the kids out to dinner. Must give props to our waiter who was awesome and didn't even flinch when I grabbed his butt! (by mistake of course!) After dinner we received a call that the freeway had just opened and we needed to get on the immediately to beat the rush. I pushed the pedal to the metal and we took off. There was still some traffic which took up about another 1/2 but once we passed the crash site (overturned tanker) we were one our way.
The mood in the car became upbeat and we couldn't wait to get to our hotel room. Things went smooth for a while until McKenzie had to go to the bathroom AGAIN! I was in no way going to stop at a gas station so I pulled over to the side of the road. Which made my sister scream about how crazy I was to pull over on the 91 freeway to have my three year old pee!" Realizing i was being a little crazy I drove to a gas station.
Finally all was well and we were ready to have some fun! Once we pulled off the main highway towards Palm springs the excitement in the car grew, then McKenzie threw up all over Michelle!
Now my sister can not handle throw up. She gags like crazy! Me? I'm okay with it, it's better than poop and heaven knows I have had my share of both! So with Michelle dry heaving and McKenzie crying and covered in throw up, we finally pulled up to our hotel! To which Michelle exclaimed that there was NO WAY she was walking through the lobby, smelling like throw up and looking like h*ll at such a nice hotel.
It took a few minutes to clean everyone up and gather our stuff. As we filed into the lobby to check in I heard a woman say. "Wow, they have a lot of kids."
I felt like saying " Yes lady, we do! would you like to keep one for the weekend??
In the end it was a fun but very exhausting trip and I would do it all over again.... but next time ladies either we leave the kids at home or we hire some help!!!

Kristen

Cries of the children...

2010-05-23T19:39:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,

If I cried as much as my children do daily I would be an exhausted mess! I"ve often thought about keeping a log on how many times my kids cry...and i'm not just talking about my 2 year old twins. Today my son had a break down as well. I hide in my own closet probably once a month and have a good cry as well. It seems to release so much tension and often I feel better but kids seem to do it so automatically. I guess it comes from being unable to express themselves well. We as adults can tell someone off if we are upset, we can calm ourselves down when we are feeling out of control, we can verbalize hurt feelings when we need to. But all kids know to do is CRY!

I can't wait for the day when words are replaced with crying as the crying drives me out of my mind! Of course then maybe i'll long for the crying because my kids will be telling ME off!! Hahahaha

Kristen

universe and me still at Odds?

2010-04-26T10:45:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers
This is how my last 12 hours went. 10pm- me bed (alone aaron out of town) 11pm McKenzie cries . She finally has caught the cold Maire has been dealing with the past few days. I get her back to sleep and drag myself back down to the couch (where I sleep when Aaron is gone, with my pepper spray I might add!) 12am- McKenzie crying again. I see what's the matter, give her some medicine and get her back to sleep. Again I drag myself down to the couch. 1am- more crying but this time I just listen until she stops...terrible mom! 3:30 am- again with the crying and again I listen until it stops but this time I have to get up because now my head is pounding and I'm so stuffed up that i can't breath. I caught the cold!
Finally, able to get some sleep until time to get son up for school. Things were then going well until I announced to the girls we needed to go to the store for more milk and medicine! All Heck broke loose. No one wanted to get dressed but McKenzie was the worst. She had me rolling around on the floor with her with my legs wrapped around her waist trying to keep her still so I could get her dress over her head. But that girl is freaky strong! Every time I got the dressed pulled over she somehow managed to get it off. Add to this that Maire thought I was hurting McKenzie who was screaming at the top of her lungs, started to hit with with any toy she could find crying for me to stop! It was madness I"m telling you! After ten minutes of this struggle, i grabbed my cell phone, ran to Tyler's bedroom and locked the door. I sent a 911 call to my neighbor who said she could come over so that I could run to the store.
Right after that call was placed guess who comes knocking on the bedroom door carrying her dress asking me to put it on??? Yep, my little devil McKenzie who then started to have a fit because now she couldn't go "bye bye"!
Ugh! i hate when my children are sick! Lord help me today!!!

kristen

THe universe doesn't seem to be happy unless I'm covered in blood!!

2010-04-23T13:18:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,
My poor little McKenzie has done it again! It seems that she is definitely going to be accident friendly. During lunch this afternoon I set both girls at the table to eat while I snuck in the living room to catch some scripture reading. Hadn't done it in the morning yet and i was feeling like my crazy day was only going to get worse unless i got the "spirit"! I was only three versus in when I hard the loud bang of a chair falling. i held my breath to see if a cry was going to follow...it did! Though it was more of a scream than a cry.
I ran to the kitchen to find McKenzie face down on the floor . I pick her up to find she has blood oozing from her mouth. Remember she is my bleeder. Once she starts it's hard to get her to stop! I grab a towel stick it in her mouth because now I'm getting blood on me. I check her front teeth to make sure they are still in tacked and the move on to other body parts to see if anything else it hurt.
With the outside checking out, I pull the towel from her mouth and try and find where all the blood is coming from, praying with all my heart that she hasn't bitten so far through her tongue that she will need stitches.
Of course she is very upset that I'm trying to look in her mouth. I have her drink a glass of water in an effort to clear the settling blood from her tongue so I can check the wound. As she drinks the cup fills up with a mixture of blood and water. YUCK! She takes on swallow and gags it right back up. I don't blame her! Finally I rush to the freezer for my old remedy for mouth sores, ICE CREAM! It takes up a few minutes but she finally finishes the ice cream and lets me take a peak at the damage.
The very back of her tongue show indents from her four back molars but nothing that won't heal on its own. Plus she has a pretty nasty bump on her chin! My poor girl! She has got to learn to be more careful" I tell her.
She promises she will !
We'll just see about that!
Kristen

Potty training!!

2010-04-19T20:05:00.000-07:00

Dear Readers,

so potty training has officially started in our household. McKenzie has been ready for awhile but i have been putting it off not wanting to "deal" with the process. However, with summer approaching and a week on a houseboat coming our way...it's time to stop with the diapers. Marie is not so into it so I think I'll just concertate on McKenzie. She had only three accidents today and two of them were because I forgot to ask her if she needed to use the restroom. It seems that every forty-minutes she has to pee. I put a timer on to remind me but didn't hear it a couple of times :0. I can't wait until both girls are done with diapers. I remember with Tyler how wonderful it was to not have to change dirty diapers.

With the girls who poop (each) three times a day (6 poop diapers), it will sure make our house smell a lot better!!!

Kristen

Peaceful morning..

2010-03-05T12:36:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,
Today so far has been a smooth day. McKenzie stayed home from school sick while Marie headed off to school. I can't even put into words the world of difference it makes to just have one child at home at a time. There was NO screaming, NO fighting, or crying! McKenzie watched some cartoons while I exercised. then she played ever so nicely with her ponies while I wrote a little and picked up the house. She was a perfect angel!

However, now that Marie is home...the calmness is ending. It must be just as hard to be a twin as it is to be a mother of twins.

P.S I've officially started sewing! Already made two dresses (jumpers) for the girls! Having a sewing machine is so fun! Project Runway here I come!! :)

Kristen

Ever think "This is just crazy?"

2010-03-02T14:38:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,
Ever have one of those days where the kids are going wild, you stub your toe for the "hundredth" time that day, the dishes seem never to get done, the laundry looks like a monster trying to claw it's way out of the laundry room??? Do you ever just think "this whole motherhood deal is...well...just crazy?"
I've said it before and I'll say it again, it baffles my mind how i can love something so much that gives me anxiety, sleepless nights, migraines, weight gain,etc? How can I love something that just 'hurts' so bad sometimes? This was my thought today as I drove my screaming, crying, never seem to be happy in the car, children to the park for a play date.
As their screams got louder, I wondered why I wasn't just staying at home in my P.J's and having them watch movie after movie??
The answer is...I love them! I love this never ending , joyous, exhausting job of mine! Though there are day's i can't even see straight, and I feel like 'vomiting' from the stress of raising twin girls...i wouldn't have it any other way. REALLY, i wouldn't. I'd be missing out on so much joy if I didn't have my children, sure I'd have my hair and nails done all the time, and ever dime would go to my clothing but really... nail polish chips, clothing gets old and my hair...well that's another topic.
Motherhood is IT for me. Nothing will ever compare!

(just don't ask me how I feel about it around 7pm at night, my answer may be very, very different) :)

Kristen

Rain, sick kids and body aches make for a very LONG day!!

2010-02-09T19:59:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,
Still dealing with a very sick little girl. Marie has just been miserable. I feel so badly. As a mother you just want to take the sickness away. However, there is an upside when the girls are sick...they are quiet! I always know that one of them is about to get sick when they start laying on the couch and actually watching a whole program on t.V.

I myself am starting to feel those little signs of a sickness coming on. I had very little patience today and found myself doing a lot of "yoga" breathing today to calm myself down. It's just not right to lose your temper with a sick child!

Enjoyed the thunder and lightening we had this afternoon! I just can't get enough!

kristen

Your eggs are 90% gone by the age of 30!!!

2010-02-01T18:49:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

So the newest study out on women's biological clock is that by the age of thirty, 90% of a woman's eggs are gone!! WOW!!! But there is no need to panic girls. You still have 10% percent to work with...and really it only takes one egg at a time. Now if you were thinking about being like the woman who has 19 children...maybe there should be some concern but for the rest of us I think this study is just another waste of energy.

I don't think this study is going to make anyone run out and get pregnant however, it may put having children more in the forefront for some. But lets face it, if you are an L.D.S woman like I am, we usually don't wait to have babies. (sometimes the Lord makes us wait) but majority of L.D.S women seem to be doing just fine past the age of thirty!!!

We make that ten percent work for us!!!

Kristen

Ever feel the need make some money???

2010-01-26T14:19:00.001-08:00

Dear Reader,

Okay, so for awhile now I have been trying to find ways to make extra money. I thought about doing temp work again as a dental assistant one day a week, but then I'd have to find someone to watch the twins, then I tried eBay for awhile...uh...didn't work out. Then I moved on to amazon and sold used book, this actually worked well for a while but truth be told I ended up getting so busy that I ran out of time to properly do it!! Plus, the books that didn't sell drove my husband crazy! I might start doing it again but on a way lower scale. who knows.

Now I'm trying to do some freelance writing over the Internet. But before I can apply for the "real jobs" I have to write a certain amount of articles. This isn't too bad since I love to write and I'm actually learning stuff in the process. Like does anyone know what "national Sorry day is?? I DO NOW and last night I learned how to make lotion from goats milk!!! Who knew!!

I don't know why I have this urge to earn my "own" money, but I do, though my time is kinda tied up in this thing called "raising a family"!!! hahaha. I know my time with come to get out there and make some "real money". There is a season for everything right???

Kristen

I'm back!!!...Well almost

2010-01-25T20:25:00.000-08:00

Dear Reader,
Okay so I finally got a computer to work with (mine is still down). I never realize how long it takes for a computer to get fixed! Anyhow, just got back from a wonderful ski trip to Utah with friends. The first day of skiing was a major challenge for me, in fact I quit mid-day and hung out in the lodge :) It was a great break from the kids, but they are just so darn cute when you see them after a few days . McKenzie had a lot to tell me about her weekend. I understood most of what she was saying. The excitement that crosses their face when your kids see you after a few days is priceless! It's the best part about going away.

Thankfully the girls were good to me today! though the teacher at school did say they got into a "smack down" with each other. We are still working on the whole fighting issue. Hopefully tomorrow is just as good as today.

Kristen

Looking forward to the New Year!!

2009-12-26T08:56:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

All the gifts are open and the baking is done!!! I'm so happy the Holiday's are over! I'm so tired of wrapping gifts, making gifts and baking until my arms ache. But every minute was worth it. This was a wonderful Christmas. The kids had a blast. The girls really got into the "Christmas spirit" by ripping up the wrapping paper to get to the gifts. I really didn't even have to help them, they got the idea pretty quickly. Now I just have to go through their existing toys and pluck some out to give to charity. Out with the old and in with the new!

As always my husband was into gift giving. He did a great job....though maybe just a little overboard!! Hahahaha...he is such a little kid when it comes to Christmas.

Thanks to all our family to put up with our screaming and non-sharing twins! 2 1/2 year old twins girls is .....well....H*ll! There is no other way to put it! The whining alone has pushed poor hubby over the edge. He said he can't wait to get back to work. "work is like a vacation compared to this". I just shrugged my shoulders and replied " Now you know why I've lost my mind!"

Hope everyone has a great day!

Kristen

broken computer...trying to survive the holidays...

2009-12-22T16:41:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

My computer finally died, and I've been DYING without it. Aaron is "letting" me use his even though he is afraid I will break it.

The past week has been crazy as the holiday's always are. The girls have been extra hard and my patience have been extra short! However, we have had some highlights with friends going gun shooting (the best) and looking at Christmas lights while sipping hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies. By the time Christmas day rolls around I"m so ready for it to be over but i am trying to enjoy the season.

I'm grateful for the past year and I am looking forward to the upcoming year. The girls will be one year older and I will hopefully be one year wiser!!! Thank you to family and friends for enriching my life so much. I hope I do a little of the same.

Merry Christmas,

Kristen

Finals...Guns...Oh My!!

2009-12-16T21:13:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

The girls have been very whinny the last few days and today I almost lost my mind!! Sometimes it's just so hard to keep patient when someone needs you attention all the time. On days like these I do a lot of deep breathing!

I was able to get some Christmas wrapping done! Which made me feel good. Also I am making some homemade gifts for the first time this year and though I was dreading it at first, I found I really enjoyed myself. I've been busy tonight trying to study for my Shakespeare final this week. Can't wait for this class to be over and done with. I'm sick of trying to figure out what the heck the characters are saying!

Aaron and i have talked for over a year about getting a handgun for home protection. Both of his father's have one and some friends of ours as well. I was against guns in the home for a long time but with certain things happening to us in the past year and with Aaron gone a lot I'm now all for it. I don't ever want to feel unprotected again. It was a funny thing to walk into a gun store and ask for help with picking out a gun. Thanks to Fred who was very helpful and even let me "shoot" a few different guns. It was very surreal. Now all I have to do is study for a gun safety test, pass, pick out a gun (after i try some out at a shooting range) and wait ten days for the gun to be in my possession. I can't wait to learn how to actually use one properly!! It will defiantly make me feel better at night. Now when someone tries to break into our home we won't have to use our sword again!!!!

Kristen

rambling....

2009-12-13T16:09:00.000-08:00

Dear Reader,

So for years my favorite movie has been "To Kill a Mocking Bird", and it still is but now I am adding "Legends of the Falls". It's rated R, I know! But I've only watched the t.v version . Today I was sat watching it for the third or more time, I realized that I love the whole story. I feel the pain and the joy that the characters feel. Plus, come one, it's vintage Brad Pitt. Who doesn't love that???

the girls have been pretty good this week. however, one day it took me a good twenty minutes to get them into the car since I can't pick them up. Sometimes they take advantage of this fact. The tummy is continuing to heal nicely. I wore heels today at church and as amazed at how much you use your core for certain shoes! It felt like every ab muscle was tightening up to balance me.

We had a wonderful weekend spent with lots of good friends. The child's gave yet another awesome Christmas party and the ward party was probably the best ever. They served Prime Rib . Normally i'm not a big meat eater, but I ate every last bite of my slice of meat. I felt llike John Candy in the movie "the Great Outdoors" when he tries to eat that big piece of steak !That's what i love most about the holiday's, spending time with people you care about.

Kristen

feeling great!

2009-12-08T08:54:00.000-08:00

Dear readers,

Today is the sixth day and I am feeling great. I had a wonderful sleep and was able to get breakfast and the kids ready for school this morning. Now I am exhausted and my back is killing me but I have a few hours I can rest so I'll be fine. Today I get the tubes taken out. Can't wait! They are the hardest to deal with. I remember with my breast lift the minute they took the tubes out I felt so much better.

Girls were really cranky this morning and I was so thankful that the preschool director said they could come every day this week to help me recover. I don't know what I would have done if they were home with me right now.

Tyler has an all star game for football this weekend and will have practice this week. Even though he loves playing football he hates going to practice. he was excited when it was cancelled yesterday because of the rain! By the way, loved the rain yesterday!!! I love a good storm.

Happy b-day to the cutest nephew in the world, Ethan! love you, Auntie Kristen

Tummy tuck hard...but worth it in the end.

2009-12-06T10:18:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

What a week I have had. I was schedule to get my tummy tuck on Wed but Marie came down with the stomach flu on Tuesday so I pushed the surgery back to Thursday...I think I already told you this...anyways the surgery went great. Today is the fourth day and i am finally feeling well. It was a little harder than I had expected and I defiantly would never tell anyone to get one unless they had a lot of excess skin from pregnancies. I've seen pictures of women who only have a small pooch do it and well...let me tell you, it would not be worth it for that.

Of course even after i had my breast done I thought "why did you do this" but it was one of the best things I ever did for myself. I'm just so thankful that my "mommy Makeover" is complete and I don't have to deal with anymore surgeries.

I've been at my parents house since the surgery and they have taken such good care of me! I'd never be able to recover at home. Aaron has had a very tough weekend with the kids. Marie was still vomiting off and on and then by Friday McKenzie caught the virus!! Poor guy! He's been the best about the whole thing, not complaining even once. Ugh...I would definitely be complaining if I was him!

Today I go home and I'm so excited. I miss my family terribly! I need their kisses and snuggles!

Also thanks to all the well wishes I got from friends and family and a special thanks to my life saver "nanny" Kristen who watched the girls on Saturday and dealt with throw-up and diarrhea's! She said the girls smelt so bad she gave them a bath. I love you so much for all that you do!!! Your the best!

Kristen

Okay...so next year we will ALL get the flu shot!!!

2009-12-02T14:28:00.001-08:00

Dear Readers,
The flu has hit our humble home! Poor Maire came down with it yesterday. I spent all day cleaning up her vomit! For some reason she hates to vomit in the bowl or toilet, plus she gives me no warning at all! Our poor family room couch and rug have been through the ringer! I think it's time to get a new carpet. It was almost comical chasing her around the home with a bowl.

Today was supposed to be my tummy tuck, but I rescheduled it so that i could take care of my baby. So as long as I don't get the flu myself, I will be under the knife at 7am tomorrow. My Dr. was very understanding ! Already love you Dr. Mozer!!

kristen

Homework at my age??!!

2009-11-30T21:09:00.000-08:00

Dear readers,
This will be short and sweet,as I just spent more than five hours answering a mid-term and writing an essay for my Shakespeare class. My fingers are dying! Why do I love school so much???

McKenzie is starting to potty train herself. successful pees in the toilet +1, poops +1....lets hope for some more!!

Kristen

Another road trip to Utah....i must be crazy!

2009-11-26T20:23:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

Yep, you read the title right! We made another road trip up to Utah for Thanksgiving. And listen...officially this will be are LAST road trip to Utah until the girls are older. We almost turned around even before we got to victor ville, which is normally only 45 mins. away but took us about two hours with traffic. Why we left at 12pm the day before thanksgiving is beyond me.

However, Tyler really wanted to go snowboarding with his dad so we gave in and continued the drive, but decided to stay the night near Vegas to break up the trip. We had a great time waling around Vegas and getting dinner. once we got to our hotel we were all exhausted and ready for bed. Aaron bought a room for him and one the kids and another room for me and the other two kids. Well my luck was bad because I got the sick kids, who never slept all night and vomited all over me at 4 am in the morning, forcing me out of bed and calling housekeeping for new bedding. I called Aaron's room and like a good husband traded room with me so that i could go sleep in his room with the sleeping kids.

After two hours of sleep *(for me) we hit the road. The morning drive wasn't that bad even though McKenzie threw up once. Today we are thankful for making our destination!! The food was great, the company even better and I'm about to put the kids to bed and hit the road for a midnight sale at the outlets in Park City!!

Kristen

New Moon Madness!!!

2009-11-20T19:33:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

My husband bought tickets for New Moon at 12 am this morning! My friends had been trying to get me to buy tickets for awhile but I'm really not an opening night person. I like waiting a week or so and then seeing a movie when it's not so crazy. However, my good friend Jen and I got "roped" into seeing a 9pm showing of Twilight and then the 12 am showing of New Moon with our husbands. Crazy I know!!! We were so tired by the time New Moon rolled around. Jen almost went home since she had to show up to work the next morning for a 8 hr shift as a nurse. Aaron kept on insisting she stay, i said I'd probably go home if I was her but she was a trooper and stayed. Also funny story, when she went to the restroom the women's bathroom was so full the women were going into the men's...with the MEN IN THEM!! The poor men used the urinals while the women used the stalls. She said the men were trying to "cover' their "family jewels" while they went to the bathroom. Hilarious!

As many of you know the movie was great. Even though the book was sooooo much better. I'm glad it finally opened I can stop hearing about twilight, new moon, Rob and Kristen etc soo much. We of course had some crazy fans in the theatre with us. I love those books just as much as anybody else....but (sorry if I offend some) let's get a grip Mom's!!! Sometimes those deep crazy feelings for actors and a movie need to be kept.....well deep!!! That's what dreams are for. We don't need to let the world know that we've lost our minds!!!

One embarrassing moment at dinner. I wore an Edward shirt that my mother bought me. I figured this was the time to wear it. but I did hide it a little with a sweater, though his head was "peeking out". Anyways I ran into a little girl...well probably thirteen with the same shirt!!! I wanted to just die!!!!

Kristen

When there's love at home???

2009-11-18T17:20:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,
This afternoon I heard Tyler yelling at one of the girls to stop doing something and it gave me a moment of pause. Is he yelling because I do??? I don't see myself as a yeller in the home but i know I raise my voice. It got me thinking of how i can discipline with love and not anger. This is something I have not mastered and ....frankly don't know if I ever will.

But I'm really going to start trying. I want my crazy, chaodic home to be full of peace! I know with the kids that i have, and my crazy husband that I am hoping for a lot ...but here's to dreams!!!

Kristen

Really?? Again....MORE BLOOD!!

2009-11-17T15:23:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

Fighting twins are not fun!!! The crying and whining has many times almost pushed me over the edge. Today was one of those days. I could feel the stress building up in me and the scream wanting to come out. But i was a good mother and I pushed those feelings down and spoke in a calm, soothing, loving but stern voice. Ugh! It takes all the strength I have to not just give a good whack to the bum!!

Daughter McKenzie cut herself this afternoon, right before nap time of course. I still haven't found what she got into but she had blood dripping from five cuts on her left leg and a small cut in the crevice of her left had. If she was a teenager I'd think she was a "cutter". As I cleaned her up and covered her with band aids I wondered what would make her continue to cut herself after the first one? She's done things like this before. I think she has a high pain tolerance and it takes a while for her pain receptors to make it to her brain!

At least I didn't get any blood on me this time!!!

Kristen

When will I stop feeling run down???

2009-11-16T21:30:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

What a weekend I had! Aaron and Tyler went out of town for the Steeler's game in Pittsburgh. They defiantly had some great daddy/son time. I stayed back with the girls and thankfully for me, my youngest sister Erica decided to come down for a visit. She was a huge help! I don't know how i do this mothering thing without her!!! I totally get "sister wives"! J/K

Today I was again feeling under the weather. I've really got to up my vitamins or something! I can't afford to not be on my A game with these girls. By the time I dropped them off to school this morning (8:30 am) I was thrashed. Even the preschool teacher noticed.
" You look like you've had some type of crazy morning! Go get a good cup of hot coffee." She said.
In that moment I wished i could get a huge jolt of caffeine because heaven knows I needed it. With a foggy head I forged through my day, doing laundry, writing an essay on Hamlet that was due and dealing with my crazy girls whom I love!

It is now 9:40 pm and as I sip some theraflu for my achy body after picking up Aaron and Tyler from the Los Angles airport, I am thankful to have my husband home so that I can finally get a good night's sleep.

Lifes ups and downs...

2009-11-12T18:33:00.001-08:00

Dear Readers,
Isn't life just crazy? We never know what it is going to throw at us. We just need to learn to roll with the punches. I listened to a talk the other day on the BYU channel that spoke of this very thing. How especially women we can get upset and depressed over the roller coaster life but how we need to take heart because that is one of the things life is about. Learning how to deal with difficulties.

I know for a fact my challenges only make me better and stronger even though I'd rather not have them! Sometimes this is the only way for us to grow. I often wish life could be easier but I'm thankful for the hard, fun, joyful, crazy life I do have. Every day, even the one's were I lose my mind are a blessing. Thank you Father in Heaven.

Kristen

Another Crazy Day!

2009-11-10T19:43:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,

Had another crazy day! McKenzie is getting a molar and has been cranky for two days. This morning everything seemed to be going wrong and i found myself yelling at the girls so I hide myself in Tyler's room and sobbed. After a good cry I felt better, though it was only 10:30 in the morning.

However the rest of the day went a little smoother. I got some home projects done so that made me feel good about myself. I just keep telling myself i only need to make it through the next two years and then the girls should get easier....at least that's what I tell myself.

Kristen

Nothing makes you feel worse about your body than a PLASTIC SURGEON!

2009-11-06T15:25:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers,.
So every since the girls were born I've known that a tummy tuck was most defiantly in the cards for me! Nothing does a number on your body than carrying twins to 37 weeks that weigh over 7lbs each. Needless to say I have finally hit the point where I am sick of looking at my stomach. I won't go into the horrific details but trust me it's not pretty.

So today I had my second consult with a Dr to get thing's put back together. As I stood in my underwear exposing my ugly "secret", the Dr. tugged, pulled and 'slapped" my extra skin I never felt more ugly!! I mean, I know it doesn't look pretty, but oh my gosh after that appt. I KNOW it's not pretty!

The Dr. was great in making me feel like it wasn't as bad as I thought but listen I'm not blind and neither is he. Now I just have to see one more guy and decide who is going to "slice me open' during Christmas break.

I'm so thankful for my children and I'm SO thankful to live in a time where "broken" body parts can be fixed!

ps. for those of you who will judge me for plastic surgery, All I have to saw is ...don't judge until you've lived in a twins mom's stomach!!!!

P.S I've got IMPLANTS too!!! hahahah

Kristen

Halloween is over...so what's with all the BLOOD!

2009-11-05T18:06:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I knew if I waited long enough today I would have a topic. It can with a bang tonight while I was busy fixing dinner. The twins fight ALL the time. In fact I've started letting them "duke' it out because I can't be there for every argument. So when I hear screams I wait to see how long they are going to last. If the screams get louder I help out but most of the time they are fighting over a toy and work it out themselves. Or the stronger one wins!

Well tonight as I was hurrying to make dinner, pick up the house before hubby got home, and get Tyler ready for football I heard a scream from Maire. I was not alarmed as this was about the fifth scream I had heard in the span of like 15 mins. That was until Tyler came running into the kitchen saying that Maire was bleeding. So I calmly walked into the playroom figuring that she had a busted lip. (McKenzie bit right through her lip two night ago and bled everywhere).

As I started to serve the damaged I noticed that Maire was laying face down in a pretty good size puddle of blood. I picked her up , looked at her lip and noticed that it was actually her nose that was bleeding. Well you know how hard and long those can bleed and trying to get a two year old to let her hold her nose is just...well mission impossible! As i tried to hold my screaming child down she snorted and sprayed blood into my face and all over my CUTE, NEW WHITE SHIRT! Why I buy white is a whole other problem! Once I was able to calm her there was a knock at the door which I ignored because as I glanced into the mirror I realized that I looked like I belonged in a horror movie!

Needless to say it's only 6 pm and I am sooo DONE! Can't wait until girls bed time!!!

kristen

Halloween was a SCREAM!

2009-11-04T09:34:00.000-08:00

Dear Reader,

Miss that last couple of day's due to illness. It must be fall, because it seems during this time I'm sick every other week!!!

Halloween was a very fun night. We had a few friends and family over which made it that much better. All the kids looked great dressed up. Of course my girls wanted their costumes off like five minutes after I put them on. I guess they were just not feeling it!

Tyler's costume (which I made) look great for about ten minutes but once he started running around the seams started to pop! So in desperation I stapled the seams shut. You know it actually worked really well. Forget the whole sewing thing! I'll just staple clothing together!!Hahaha

Trick-0r-Treat went very slowly with so many little kids. In fact we only made it around the block before everyone was pooped! Poor Maire had a melt down earlier in the evening and went to bed. I thought about waking her up for trick-or-treating but decided to let her sleep. She slept the whole night so i think I made the right decision.

I can't believe Halloween is over! I wait all year for this one special, scary, and fun night! Now that my decorations are down I've got to start thinking about Thanksgiving. Ummmm, can't we just do Halloween again?

Kristen

Oak Glen Bites the Dust...

2009-10-30T20:17:00.000-07:00

Okay for the second year in a row we have taken the trek out to Oak Glen with the Child's for Apple picking and for the SECOND time in a row we have missed the "picking season"! Last year we had a lovely picnic but hung out so long that the orchard's closed. This year we decided to forgo the picnic and head right to the orchard. However, the traffic out there was so bad that we didn't get to the orchard until closing time. But in the end that didn't end up mattering because this year the picking season ended earlier due to a small crop!

Ugh! So with the kids going crazy from being in the car for two hours we headed to the little village that we went to last year to walk around the shops and get some dinner. To our horror all the shops closed down promptly at five! And you guessed it....we got there at five! We let the children run around for a little bit chasing pea cots, each other and discovering a dying rat (probably from poison).

We hoped to have a great dinner so that the trip would not be a total bust. The little diner that was in the village seemed promising. I love old diner's. They have the best comfort food. Boy did we strike out on this one! My food and Aaron's food was good but poor Bryan and Cheri got jipped big time! Cheri couldn't' even eat her meal, (it was that bad) so she quickly threw some in the trash so that the waitress wouldn't feel bad. Bryan grinned and bared it as he ate almost every last bite (there you go Bry, you made it into the blog! Now no more crying !J/K)

After dinner , Cheri needed heartburn meds and I needed a Valium from chasing the girls around. They never stop!!! Honestly I should be a lot skinnier than I am!

So will the Child's and Hoke's try Oak Glen next year....well just have to see... maybe we can find someone with a local apple tree and then go out for apple pie at Polly's pies!!!

Kristen

Halloween is in full swing!

2009-10-29T11:55:00.001-07:00

It's been a great day( even though I'm fighting ANOTHER "FLU" BUG). The other night Tyler decided that he didn't want to go as a transformer (we bought the costumes earlier in the year for dress up) and that he wanted to be "Mario". So with only a few day's left and absolutely little to none sewing skills I headed this morning to the fabric store. I bought enough blue fabric to make overalls, we have a red shirt and I'm not sure what to do about the hat...but I'll worry about tomorrow. I'm actually excited to see how this turns out. I'll keep everyone posted.

While at the fabric store I wandered over to the craft section and found some paper pumpkins that the girls could paint. Once I had the necessary tools we headed home. I set everything up outside and helped the girls paint the pumpkins a glittery orange. They loved it. The painting even extended to paper. In the end they were a mess but for twenty-whole minutes they were doing a project together and all was well.

Then it was time to put the paint away....All H*ll broke loose, but nothing that a little "sponge bob square pants couldn't' solve :)

Now on to baking treats for handout tonight. YUM! I love Autumn.
P.S The heat comes back tomorrow :(

Kristen

Church Book Store in Orange going out of business!!

2009-10-27T13:03:00.000-07:00

I can't believe that Deseret Book's is going out of business! Yes the books are expensive and to tell you the truth lately I've been finding the same books on Amazon for cheaper....but...sometimes i love just going in the store and browsing! That's not going to happen now. The next closest store is twenty-mins away. There are some good deals right now though. Everything is 75% off.

I was desperate to get there so against my better judgement I took the girls with me. I was able to get six books and two DVD for only 13$! That's right, I said $13 dollars!!! I am planning on heading back tomorrow once the girls are in school.

The line to check out was forever long. In fact, after about a 1/2 the girls had "had" it. Lucky for me, I had a cousin who was in the process of checking out and she offered to pay for my stuff so I could get out of there! She was an answer to silent prayers for sure. I handed her a twenty and said " keep the change" as I dragged my goods and both screaming girls out to the car.

Deseret I will really miss you!

kristen

Party In the Mouth Day!!

2009-10-26T18:55:00.000-07:00

What a day I had. My friend Cheri invited me to a book signing for the chef of "Every Day Italian". We arrived two hours early and enjoyed some apple cider, pumpkin muffins with pumpkin butter frosting, tomato soup( that was TOO DIE for) and a bunch of magazines! Included with our tickets was a book that was signed by the host herself. It was fun! Afterwards we went to lunch at Nordstrom's Cafe and ended our lunch with the most mouth watering cremebrulee! (how do you spell that?) Hence the "party in the mouth".

It was a wonderful day! Thanks Cheri.

Question: How do I stop whining!!!!!!

Kristen

Lift my Burdens...

2009-10-24T12:16:00.000-07:00

I've had a very overwhelming week with the girls. I think we have officially hit the terrible two's!! I've been treading "emotional water" all week. Today I felt like I was about to go under. I've just felt like sitting down and crying. Marie broke some more Halloween decor (she's been doing that all month) McKenzie woke up in a terrible mood and started the morning off by having a crying fit! I tried to make it to Tyler's football game but was only there for ten minutes because I had no strength to deal with the girls. In fact, I told Aaron I was going home because i truly felt like I might just pass out .

My stomach hurts and I feel my soul feeling the full wait of mothering twins! I love them so much, but i don't know how I'm going to survive the next few years. I don't want to be a "mean' mom but I find myself having to raise my voice a lot more just to get their attention. Not to mention I can't even count how many times i count to "three" in a day or chase them from the car into the house, or drag them upstairs for a nap.....Ugh, there I go again, I complain too much!

I really wouldn't have it any other way. I wanted more children for so long....i know this is just a stage and I have to find a way to stay sane and in control.

I came home and immediately got on Neinies dialogues. ( I don't' think the name is spelled right) but she is the burn victim that lives in Utah. She had an inspirational post link to Mormon.org and i watched a video on the atonement. It brought tears to my eyes as i realized that though I don't have the burden of grieves sins right now, I do have the "burden" of mothering twins. I sobbed as the feeling of just wanting Christ to hold me in his arms and tell me that he would help me, and strengthen me to do the job that I know i must do.

Though I still feel overwhelmed at the moment....I know that as soon as I hit my knees and ask for strength it will be given to me.

Kristen

Bonnie Hunt Show & Picture Day!

2009-10-23T12:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I missed posting because I was at ....wait for it... The BONNIE HUNT SHOW! Okay, I know a lot of you are thinking right about now "Who the heck is Bonnie Hunt?" Think cheaper by the Dozen mom...and lots of other movies I can't think of right now...oh wait..Jerry McGuire (totally spelling that wrong but I can't remember how to spell it) She 's the sister.

Anyways, I took two of my best friends who are my sister Michelle and my friend Cheri. It was a loooong taping and half the time we didn't even know who the guest were but it was fun! We got to sit front row! (ya know that's where they put all the cute girls!!) J/K. The show fed us the best hot dogs ever and Mug root beer! Plus, there was a cooking segment with the "pioneer woman". She has a blog that i just love now. So we got chocolate cake and also a FREE cookbook! In all it was an awesome 8+ hours (between driving there, show, dinner and back)

Dinner was another story. We saw a cute Italian restaurant and decided that we would try it even though one of the locals told us to go to another restaurant. Ugh! We should have listened to him. The service was terrible. We were seated ten mins before anyone came by. We never really knew who our waiter was because random people would take our order, fill our drinks etc. Plus the food was nothing special. Chili's would have been a better dinner! Needless to say My sister Michelle was not impressed. A server herself, she decided to leave a "nice" little note and a VERY, VERY small tip. Cheri ran out of the restaurant as fast as she could not wanting to have to angry man chase her down I guess. But we had a good laugh on the way back to the car. Girls we will have to do it again soon.

Picture Day:
I hate picture day. The kids NEVER look right! I try not to stress but with girls it's just so different than getting a boy ready. I had to comb and curl their hair just right, make sure their cute bows matched their dresses and so on. Once i finally had them all ready, we rushed out the door (running late like always) and as I started to get the car seats ready I turn around to find that BOTH , not just one, girls somehow fell into the MUD! I have no idea how they did this but their legs and hands were covered. I just had to start laughing. It was so ridiculous! I wiped them down with a wipe the best I could and took them to school. However, I did give the teacher a disclaimer that, "no my kids were not dirty because I didn't' bath them....they just happened to decided today was mud day!" We will see in a few weeks how the pics turned out!

Kristen

Temple Day= Full Spirit

2009-10-21T12:16:00.001-07:00

Now that the girls are in school I have been trying to make it to the Temple at least once every other week. When I went two weeks ago, it was sooo busy that I had to wait for a half hour to do some work. Today however, I was in and out in a 1/2 hour.

It feels good to go somewhere where I can feel such calm and peace. Something that my daily life is lacking. I was able to sit for about fifteen minutes while I was there and read the scriptures in peace. Usually one of the girls find me during morning scripture reading and I barely get a chapter in for the day. I loved being able to really ponder on my thoughts. To really think about somethings that I wanted guidance on.

Oh how i love being part of this gospel!! No where else could I find answers to the questions i have, no where else good I gain such strength. It is so comforting to know that my Heavenly Father is truly watching out for me. And heaven knows that i need his watchful eye more than ever.

As I left the temple and drove home my spirit was full and I felt great. Uh....then I picked up the girls from school and immediately the calm "flew" away. I had to chase both girls down in the parking lot because they decided they didn't want to go in the car. I also had to wrestle each of them into the car seat. There was most defiantly some pinching involved! As the crying continued all the way home I wondered how things could change so abruptly!

LOVE, LOVE, my girls but....I think I'll LOVE them even more when their....about five???

Kristen

Are Family Secrets Really Secrets At All??

2009-10-20T13:46:00.000-07:00

I have a wonderful family. It is a joke in our family that everybody knows what's going on with everyone else but it's all on the "down low". No one knows that the other one knows anything!! I've got so much good stuff floating around in my head that it's a wonder I can think straight!! I was thinking today, "is it good for a family to know each other business or is it the cause of "drama"?

I don't' know the answer... I know some families that don't discuss deep issues and though there isn't friction there also isn't a certain closeness I guess. As a parent you must decide what is okay to share and what is totally off limits. I think there is a good balance somewhere. I hope that by the time my children are older I've learned the trick to keeping things balanced. As a family we may be "all up in each other's biZness...but thats how we support each other....it's how we know what is happening good or bad in the lives of the other.

I love my family. Crazy and drama filled we are sometimes...but I wouldn't have it any other way!! (at least that's how i feel today:) )

Kristen

Love those Sunday lesson!!

2009-10-19T13:04:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've had a Sunday school lesson that made a huge impression on me, but this past Sunday I had an "aaha moment". I didn't realize it had made such an impression until by the end of the day when Aaron said" Wow, you got a lot out of that lesson". I guess I had been talking about it the whole afternoon! I'm so thankful for those who take the time to give 100 percent to their callings.

I'm having another "Bla" day but it's because i am fighting off a cold. I hope I win this battle....wasn't I just sick??? Girls are doing well today but my patience is very thin because of feeling yucky. After an hour of trying to get them to take their afternoon nap I finally gave up and popped in a Movie. I'll try again after I pick up Coby.

I have a good friend that just got called into the nursery and after church yesterday she had this to say about my girls, " I'm getting to know your girls better....I never realized how full your hands are with them"! It made me feel good and "depressed" at the same time. Good because it was someone validating how hard the twins are, bad...well because it was just another reminder of....well...HOW HARD THE TWINS ARE!

We are headed to the pumpkin Patch for family home evening tonight! I can't wait!

Kristen

Thank heavens for 30 day money back guarantee

2009-10-17T08:36:00.000-07:00

Remember when I said that I LOVED my body??? Well I do....but I've decided that I will REALLY love it if I'm ten pounds lighter :) . I know , I know, I've succumbed to the "world's view" of an attractive body! I can't help it! I don't want to be a size zero but I do want to get rid of that stinking stomach pooch!

Anyways, on my quest for a quick way to lose the pounds...I ordered nutrisystem. We've all seen the commericals! I've even checked it out on the Internet over five times, but in the end always decide against it because of the program being so costly.

Well, this time I gave in and ordered the food. As I waited for the package to arrive my excitement over the possible lost pounds grew. Then on afternoon the package landed on my doorstep. I hurriedly dragged it into the house and ripped open the box with a knife. There was a ton of food! I excitedly looked over everything but by the time i was done I had some concerns.
First of all the portions are extremely small! I know you have to add your own fruits and veggies to the side, so I wasn't too worried.

For that days lunch I picked out a pasta. It was only about a cup of food but i was determined to make it work. I boiled the water and poured it over the dry noodles and waiting for them to soften. Once the pasta was ready I took a big bite! All I can say is "YUCK"! It was so tasteless! sipping chicken broth would have tasted better! As disappointment rushed over me, I decided to try one of the snacks. The "cheese Puff's weren't that bad, but I knew there was no way I was going to make it on this diet with the tasteless food.

I feared that I had just wasted a good amount of money. So this morning I hopped on the Internet and was so relieved to find that Nurti-system has a money back guarantee!!! Yeah!! Needless to say the package is going back tomorrow and um....well I'm just going to have to exercises more and watch what I eat!!! :) If it only was really that simple!!

Kristen

Target is still the best!!!

2009-10-14T13:22:00.000-07:00

With the colder weather I've realized that my children have out grown all of their warm clothing!! It wasn't in my budget this month to buy any new clothes but when I had to send my girls to school in shirts and pants that were too small because they only fit into summer clothes I decided a few items needed to be purchased.

I made my way to the new Kohl's that had just opened in my area. I've been to a Kohl's only one other time to buy some clothing for the kids and got some really good deals. As I browsed the aisle I found a lot of outfits that I liked. I didn't' pay too much attention to the pricing as everything was on" sale". However, once i checked out I got a big shock! My total was WAY more than I wanted to spend, but feeling foolish I grabbed my fulls bags and left. I should have said right then and there to the cashier " NO thanks!" But really who am I kidding...I would be sooo embarrassed to do that.

As I drove in the car to my other destination, which was target. I decided that majority of the clothes were going to have to go back. There was no way I was going to be able to justify spending that amount of money when it wasn't budgeted for. While I target i picked up my usual snack items and other necessities. Before i checked out I decided to see if I could find any of the same types of outfits I had bought the kids for less. Of course I DID! I got pretty much the same things for 1/2 of the cost for each of the outfits at Kohl's.

Needless to say, I know Kohl's still has great deals, but Target is just the best one stop , shop place. I can get my groceries, bedding, toys, makeup, clothing, just about anything I could want there!

Target thank you for saving me a LOAD of money this morning.

Kristen

P.S I drove to another Kohl's to return all the other items purchased earlier :)

Ford...Fix Or Repair Daily....

2009-10-13T12:58:00.000-07:00

I never believed this statement until today! I have had my ford expedition for only 3 years and yesterday the transmission failed!! We need a whole new transmission! This is crazy for a car that only has 56,0000 miles on it! If this car wasn't paid off I'd say let's fix it and sell it...but not having a car payment is too good to give up. However, the next time I get a car...it will NOT be a ford! GMC I don't know why I ever left you???

The girls have been wonderful today. Since my car is out of commission we have just hung out at home. I was able to get some much needed cleaning in and they played nicely the whole time. Okay, there was a few spats here and there but as a whole it was a very calm morning! I needed a whine free morning!

Here's to hoping that our afternoon goes as well. :)

Kristen

Duggars make me want more.....

2009-10-12T13:25:00.000-07:00

I am LOVING this cold weather!!! My heart soared when I overheard someone saying it was supposed to rain today!! Yeah! I hope so. Nothing puts me in a good mood like a cold fall day. :)

As I watched a morning program on the Duggars, who are having their 19th child, that small little thought of having more children crept into my mind. I gave a visiting teaching message today on the topic of children as well and how these spirits have waited so long to come at this important time in human history. The Duggars spoke about how each child is such a blessing and it just melted my heart. I love my children so much! If I could be a mother of a large family I would....but honestly I don't think I can! I"m struggling with my three (as my readers know). Maybe in three more years I'll be ready but then am I really going to want to start the process all over again????

Ugh!! Those "Dang" Duggars make me feel weak!! How is that mom not "crazy"??? Come to think of it...maybe she is??

Kristen
P.S. I want to give a shout out to all teachers! As I worked in my son's classroom today and listened to his teacher teach, I was so thankful for those of you who have chosen this "thankless" profession. Teachers are awesome!

Lost my mind...among other things....

2009-10-09T12:02:00.000-07:00

Both Maire and McKenzie are in "great moods" today!! I knew it was going to be a rough day when McKenzie started crying within ten minutes of being up this morning. Thankfully, It was a school day so I glad'y got them ready for school and dropped them off as early as I could!

Mommytime was spent by picking up the house, forty minutes of exercise and then a much needed trip to Target. My mood was great when it was time to get the girls. However, within moments it came crashing down! Here's how the last hour went.

I picked up girls from school. They were all smiles and waving goodbye to the staff. On our way out of the front we passed the "library". McKenzie saw a book she wanted. She grabbed it and was insisting that we take it home. I "kindly' told her that the book had to stay. She preceded to plop herself down and the ground and not move. I can't do much with another kid in my arms so I took Maire to the car and went back for McKenzie. Once i took the book away the real crying began. As I try to hold a wiggly two year old who is almost 40 pound!! I realized my shirt was half way down exposing my bra and garments. However, there was not much I could do so I just waved to the staff that was now staring at my struggle and dragged my little "princess" to the car. Once in the car she was upset about the movie that was playing! Meanwhile little Maire sat quietly and smiled the whole way home :)

As we walked into our home things seemed to have calmed down. I put on a cartoon for them to watch for a few minutes before nap time. While removing both of their shoes McKenzie again lost it. She wanted only her shoes off NOT her socks as well.

By now I have had it! She is two years old!! She can't get specific like that. Until she can dress and undress herself she needs to "deal' with it.
As her crying only grew louder I gave three warning about how the crying had to stop. Finally I couldn't handle it anymore and ran up to her and squeezed her cheeks together and told her to STOP!

Feeling out of control myself i decided it was nap time! It has been ten minutes since I "threw" her in her crib and I can still hear her having a fit. But I don't care....I'm in the guest bedroom writing and taking DEEP breaths!! Mom must keep herself sane at all times! If i really lose it....well then we are all done for!!!

kristen

Some ideas are NOT that great!!

2009-10-08T12:47:00.000-07:00

Frequently I suffer from migraines. Not fun at all. Acupuncture actually really helps it but I don't have a half hour to lay down at the dr. office. So usually I take some prescription Meds. Last night I took one pill and it didn't work...so after an hour I took half of another pill....still not working. So I took the other half. In all I ended up taking 2 Norco pills and my head was still pounding! I have a massage that i use for my neck that helped relax some of the muscles but by the time bed time came around my head was still throbbing. However, the meds kept making me have weird dreams and sweating like a pig! Needless to say I didn't fall asleep until 3 am this morning!

After i dragged myself out of bed at 6:30 am i half consciously got Tyler ready for school, told him he was buying lunch because there was no way I was going to fix a lunch! Got the girls their breakfast and then crashed in the downstairs bedroom until 10 am. Of course that is with the girls coming in every ten minutes to jump on me! I still have the migraine but it's not as bad. When I finally got up for the day I felt bad about the girls just watching t.V so after picking up the house I decided we should go for a walk. I had to drop something off at my friends house and she just lives a few streets up. I thought it was a perfect idea. Get the girls out, let them use some energy and get their wiggles out.

The walk did not go as planned. Maire ran a head of me, while McKenzie walked so slow I nearly had to drag her along. Then the girls felt the need to walk up to every house and try and knock on the door! It's very difficult to chase two, two year old around! By the time the walk was over, I wondered what at ever possessed me to take a walk without the stroller????

Now I'm just gearing up for my work out on the stair master....though I would really rather go to sleep!!!

Kristen

Moments of Clarity....

2009-10-07T15:38:00.000-07:00

I was in a funk yesterday and had nothing to say!! I know...weird! Today I am trying to get in the swing of Halloween, though half of my stuff is upstairs in the attic and I have been asking my dear husband to get things down for three days now. I tried to do myself but "it's scary" up there in the dark with all the spiders and who knows what other creepy crawly things!

So like I mentioned earlier, yesterday found me in a bit of a funk. To tell you the truth i've been like that off and on for a few days now. It happens after a trip out of town. I'm always so excited to get home but then the mundane things of everyday life set in. Sometimes I find that I forget how blessed I am! I think that change is the answer and then I get that stuck in my head until it drives me crazy! Yesterday I ended up watching an episode of Oprah and she had a family dealing with a child who had severe mental illness. Those of you who saw the show, know exactly what I am talking about.

Anyhow by the time the hour was over I felt terrible for being a "brat" and thinking that I needed something else then other than what I have. Sure my life is never perfect but I am healthy, my kids are healthy, Aaron is healthy (beside a bad back) and my extended family is well. Really there isn't more I can ask for. I'm grateful for those little moments that throw me back into the reality of how blessed I truly am.

I'm thankful that I have a Heavenly Father who is willing to put up with my moments of ungratefulness and welcome me back with open arms every time!

Kristen

P.S anyone having a hard time with their kids Math?? I've found the Internet to be very helpful. Tyler and I are learning second grade math together!!!! :)

Utah, Conference, Home crazy home!!

2009-10-05T12:35:00.000-07:00

It's great to be home but I am missing Utah and my siblings. We had a relaxing weekend full of laughter!! I think my new sister-in-law Ali must think we are all nuts!!! (nutz haha) Thank you for putting up with us!

We saw the movie Fame ( i was against it but got out numbered) Let me save you all some hard earned money and tell you to skip it all together! I don't know if I would even rent it. Fame was LAME!!

Sunday morning conference was awesome. Great food and great spiritual talks is the best. Thanks to my Aunt Debbie and Uncle Greg for letting me crash on the floor! They had a bed but somehow I always end up on the floor. (miss you "RockMan". :)

One cute story was that Saturday morning I decided to get my hair colored. My roots were so bad that my own brother thought I had colored the top of my head dark on purpose!!! So a trip to the salon was a must. I was there for two hours and not one other person came in. I was so surprised that it was that slow on a Saturday! I mentioned this to my hairdresser Ashly and she laughed . " It's because it's conference weekend! This only happens in Utah!"

Boy did I feel dumb! But hey, isn't that whats TiVo is for????

Girls were in a "ripe" mood this morning! I was ready to put them to bed by 8 am! It was a good thing they had school. Though when I went to pick them up Marie was in trouble for biting another kid! Great....lets hope this isn't the start to a trend with her.

Kristen

PS. totally off topic but the copy machine at my sons school is SOOOO complicated that it took me an half an hour just to make 20 copies of something. I swear I needed an owners manual!

How many HIghway Patrol men Does it take to change a tire??

2009-10-02T19:54:00.000-07:00

Um... the to be exact is 6! I am on another road trip to beautiful but cold Utah! A road trip with just my always talking Mother! That woman can talk about anything! Really but it's good at least I don't get tired!!! The ride up here was not very eventful until we hit St. George and blew a tire! This is how it went:

ME driving and thinking to myself: Um...that was a loud pop, I wonder what that was?

My Mom: Did you hear that noise?

ME : Yeah, a rock must have hit us!

We keep on driving for a few minutes.

ME: Mom, is it windy outside because the car is moving weird?

Mom: I don't know but it's always windy in this area!

ME : I don't see any tree's moving....(car starts to move to the side of the road out of control)

Me: I THINK WE HAVE A FLAT! I scream as we pull over to the side of the road.

Within a few seconds of pulling over I get on the phone with triple A and then a highway Patrol man pulls up behind us and offers to change the tire. A few minutes after that more highway patrol come. In all we ended up having six highway officers standing around and watching the one officer change the tire. By the time the last officer pulled up he thought we were a drug bust because there was so many people on the side of the freeway!!!

Needless to say, we are so thankful to the Utah highway patrol!!! Pictures to follow!

Kristen

It's my body and I'll cry if I want too.....

2009-10-01T15:40:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been thinking about those last ten pounds that i have been trying to lose since....well lets face it, ever since my first pregnancy. But let me tell you those twins did a number on my stomach!!! If you ever want to feel better about yourself, ask to see my sagging midriff! Anyways everyday i wake up wonder how i am going to lose the weight. I try and eat good, in fact I think I eat pretty well, but I do know I have a few snacks here and there.

about a week ago, I thought I would control my portions. Which actually works but then an hour after a meal I was hungry! Okay, so then I tried to not eat past 6 pm. This actually had me dropping some weight as well. However, going to bed starving is not my idea of living. I tried the no carbs thing and years ago that worked for me, but i ate so many eggs that it takes a lot for me to eat them now. (I think I over did it)

Exercise has always been key and I've ALWAYS exercised. But i do struggle going beyond forty mins. For a few weeks last year I was running for at least an hour every other day. I dropped five pounds and felt wonderful. however, I can't keep that up. I get soooo bored and just the though of having to exercise for an hour does mind tricks to me. So I've settled on forty- mins. I also do weights twice a week , but i think I'm going to up that to three. I need to make sure I have more muscle. Muscle burns fat right???

Anyways, Today I decided that enough was enough. I'm going to embrace those ten extra pounds! I'm so sick of worrying about them. So my stomach is a little Rollie....um my husband still can't get enough of me!!! (really I'm serious!) Plus, nothing can be done about the extra skin until I'm done having kids and have it removed. (Oh , you know I'm doing that!!)

So today I say " Body I love you! I love that you gave birth to 3 beautiful children, that you can show "love' to your husband, I love that you have carried me through this life with ease, I love that you are healthy and let me accomplish my dreams!!

Lest I forget this mantra, I think I'm going to write it on my bathroom mirror.

Kristen

P.S Just remember when we see some skinny, bubble butt twenty something's walk by....One day she'll look as good as we do!!! :)

I survived!!!

2009-09-29T12:42:00.000-07:00

We all survived the mess of yesterday day! Yeah! Tyler is still home however trying to get his strength back. The girls are in perfect form. They are active again which is good and bad. They are in better moods but are back to fighting over things!!! Can't wait for school tomorrow :)

I started feeling a little sick to my stomach last night but feel better this morning. I CAN'T get sick. It's never okay for the mom to be down. Everything goes crazy if I'm not able to be in control.

The weather has cooled a bit. This morning I opened all the windows in my house and soaked in the cool breeze. Instantly my mood was lifted. Something about the smell of fall just does something to me. I took a moment to sit and just listen to the outside world (kids were watching a movie). The noise of the world rushing by were so familiar and i wondered why I didn't take the time to just sit and listen anymore. I think I get so caught up in the day to day tasks that I forget to "stop and smell the roses". I am definitely a "stop and smell the roses" kind of girl. I remember as a teenager i would hide in my room with a good book and my window open so I could hear the birds chirping, or airplanes flying over head. It's those small quiet moments that do so much to refresh the soul!

Here's hoping I can remember to seek those moments out :)

Kristen

Throw up + Poop = A lot for Mom to Do...

2009-09-28T11:15:00.000-07:00

It all started Saturday night while Aaron and I were out on a couples date. I received a call from our babysitter that Marie had just thrown up. "Okay" I thought, maybe she ate dinner too fast. she had been acting fine all day. Just as I as about to tell our sitter to just put her to bed, Aaron informed me that Marie had been complaining of a "hurt tummy" earlier that day. So with that bit of information, I knew something was up. We came home, took care of Marie and then everyone went to bed.

Thankfully we made it through the night with no incidents, but as the morning sun rose, so did the vomit from Marie! So it was no church for her! As the day wore on I was waiting for one of the other kids to get sick. I mean if one comes down with something it is going to spread like wildfire. Finally, last night around 10 pm, Tyler woke up sick! I knew it was going to be a long night when about every 15 mins he was throwing up. It lasted this way most of the night added with diarrhea! The poor kid probably has lost ten pounds, and believe me it needs so pounds.

With the night behind us and Tyler finally able to fall asleep around 7 am I checked on the girls. To my dismay Marie was burning up with a fever and McKenzie had vomited in her crib. So this is how the day as gone, kids throw up, I clean up, kids want water, fine for an hour or so, then the cycle starts again. Luckily Tyler is able to get himself to the toilet.

The only bright spot in this whole situation is that at least they all got it at the same time! It would be worse if this sickness had dragged on for the whole week!!

Kristen

A morning at the Temple...

2009-09-25T12:22:00.000-07:00

I love the Temple so much when I go....so why don't I go often?? This morning I decided to skip my morning run and head off to the temple. It's been awhile....too ashamed to tell you how long! Anyways ,once I made the short drive there I was so happy I had made the effort to come.

The spirit that surrounds the temple is so refreshing to my soul. I love being able to see people I know and share a few moments of conversation. I know we go to the temple to serve , but in reality it is for us! Being able to have the quiet time, shut out from the crazy world is priceless.

I plan to go back very soon!!! I promise :)

P.S Girls are not sleeping again!!!! I wish they would. They are so cranky when they don't get their afternoon nap :(

Kristen

Why does Good Food = major $$$$?

2009-09-24T19:01:00.000-07:00

After I dropped Tyler off at football practice tonight I had about forty-five minutes to kill so I wandered into the grocery store Henry's. As I browsed the aisles i remembered why I loved this store so much! I found whole wheat, whole grain, real fruit inside pop tarts, sweet potato fries ( I'm so over making my own), a chocolate powder drink with protein, veggies and fruits for the girls and many other things!

I love being able to feel like I am going to give my kids good wholesome food. Then I checked out! It cost me almost 100.00 for just a few items. Granted the two protein shakes did cost a lot but Ugh....why does good food have to cost soooo much? Why can't companies make it more affordable for moms to give kids the food they want but healthy?

I want nothing more than to be able to feed my kids organic food, um not going to happen with my budget. So I try to meet in the middle, some whole grains....and some not so whole!! I've decided that I definitely need to go back to Henry's for the protein shakes and the pop tarts, I tried one and they were delicious and my girls eat pop tarts like crazy.

Here's hoping that in the near future healthy food will be more affordable!!

Kristen

Lost Boy... found!

2009-09-23T19:21:00.000-07:00

What an afternoon I had! It all started around 1 pm when I was doing some book editing. The girls had finally fallen asleep for their afternoon nap and I myself was feeling drowsy. Unable to keep my eyes open anymore I set the alarm clock for 2pm when I would have to go get Tyler from school. I pushed my laptop to the side of the bed and snuggled under the blankets for a little catnap.

Then suddenly I awoke with a start! I glanced at the clocking thinking I had awoken before the alarm and was shocked to see that the time was 2:30!!! A whole 1/2 hour after pick up time!!! I jumped out of bed, pulled two very sleepy girls out of their cribs and hopped in the car. As I raced to the school, which takes about 8 minutes to get too, I hoped that the kids he plays with after school at the church were still there. I went to reach for my phone and realized I left it at home.

To my dismay as I got closer to the school, construction on the road had me stopped for a few minutes. Pulling up to the church I scanned the parking lot for Tyler. I saw no other kids and no other Mom's in their cars waiting for children. By now it was 2:40pm. I looked up in the trees, for sometimes Tyler waits for me there. Nothing! I drove around the parking lot twice to make sure I wasn't missing him and then as my panic began to heighten I decided maybe one of the other mom's took him home and i had just missed him. Plus, I wanted to grab my phone.

I raced back home, no Tyler, ran inside grabbed my phone (which was on a very low battery and about to die,) and raced back to the school while calling the mom's I knew. By the time I had talked to the second mom (who didn't know where Tyler was ) I was in full panic mode! I couldn't imagine what happened to him, and I couldn't believe I had over slept and left him a lone for so long. If someone had taken him, what was i going to do??? How would I even find him?? Could this really be happening to me?? All these questions and more raced through my mind.

Finally a friend told me to go check the front office that he might be there. I doubted it, because we had never discussed where to go if I didn't come and i didn't know if he would think to go back to the school but I parked the car and ran into the office anyways.

The moment i opened the door I was met by the Principle who immediately pointed to my precious Tyler sitting on a chair reading his latest Library Book selection. Within seconds of seeing him relief washed over me and I started to sob. I explained what happened to the Principal and she said that a mother who was at the church had instructed Tyler to come to the office. Through my cries I thanked the Principal (who gave me a much needed hug) and held Tyler's hand as we walked back to the car.

Moral of the story.... don't take naps before pick up time, if you do MAKE sure the alarm works, always have a back of plan for your kids if something should happen and NEVER leave home without your cell phone!!!

Kristen

Offically Home!

2009-09-22T12:40:00.000-07:00

Well I am officially home....and I am "officially" thinking about the next time I get a break from the girls! J/K. Today has actually been a good day so far. Though McKenzie is screaming her head off right now when she should be sleeping. However, I refuse to get her, this is "my" time.

For those who are Dan Brown fans I hope you are already reading the new book. The Lost Symbol is a great read! Dan Brown knows how to make every book a page turner. Every chance i got in Chicago I read a few pages. I was looking forward to reading majority of the book on the flight home last night, but forgetful me, packed the book in my suitcase! I was so bummed. I can't stand being on the plane without a book , so right before the flight I hit the airport bookstore and bought another book to read. Though the book is a New York Times bestseller, it can't even compare to The Lost Symbol!

The kids were happy to see us this morning. McKenzie kept touching my face and saying "mama". It was as if she was trying to make sure I was real. Tyler gave a big hug and than went about his morning. (Typical boy) . Marie gave hugs and kisses and then pushed us away so that she could watch cartoons!

I guess it should make me feel good that they didn't fall to pieces seeing us again. I think my children are used to us being gone every few months. As long as they are being taken care of, at this point I don't think they really care who it is!

FYI today is the first day of Fall! So who ordered this HEAT! I hope soon the cool weather kicks in....October is just not the same in summer heat!

P.S . Japan trip is cancelled! (yeah) So kids Halloween party is on! I'll get dates out soon.

Kristen

Farewell Chicago!!

2009-09-21T10:17:00.000-07:00

We've had so much fun but finally today we get to go home!! Yeah! Just a few more stops to make before we catch the plane. We still need to grab some presents for the kids and for those who helped watch the kids. Plus, there is an Historic Bookstore which is three levels high that I've been dying to see all week and haven't gotten there yet.

So Aaron is finally taking me! I hope it is worth the walk :)

Chicago is a beautiful city and I am so glad we made the trip out here. Our country has so many wonderful places to explore and I'm thankful that i married someone who likes to explore as much as I do!

See ya back home!

kristen

From Norte Dame to Bears Game....

2009-09-20T14:49:00.000-07:00

What a Sunday we have had! Since we have been in the city for three days now we decided to rent a car and get out of town. We drove an hour and a half away to Norte Dame college. It was way worth the drive. The campus is beautiful. Aaron's dream come true was being able to tour the football field. We just happen to see a worker who let us in and then drove us around in his little golf court and let us take pictures of whatever we wanted.

After walking around the campus for a bit, we found the mess hall and ate a delicious lunch. There was so many different things to choose from. Unable to decide I got a bunch of things, tacos, bread and butter, grilled cheese, grapes, cheese omelet, and ice cream. I have to admit i was a little embarrassed walking around with a pile of food on my plate. But each bite was wonderful!

Next we drove back to the hotel, dropped off the car and made the twenty-minute walk to Solider stadium. Aaron pretty much wanted to sprint there, so I made him give me my ticket and we parted ways. I took a lovely walked through the park, watching the leaves begin to fall. I was defiantly in no hurry to get to the game. Once I finally arrived and found my seat it wasn't ten minutes later that the skies opened up and it began to pour! "Um... I think I'm done" I stated and Aaron gave me taxi money so I could come back to the Hotel.

On the ride back, my taxi driver who was speeding on the newly wet ground, took a turn too quickly and skidded out of control. Luckily I had my seat belt on, which i never do in cabs but something told me to put it on. Thankfully, he gained control again and dropped me safely at the hotel!

Anyhow I am so ready to get home to my children who I know have totally exhausted my sister and mother! Chicago has been the best but nothing is like HOME!

Kristen

Adventure to Obama's House....

2009-09-19T16:43:00.000-07:00

Today we walked around Chicago shopping and hanging in some very beautiful parks. The day was very relaxing, that is until Aaron decided that he wanted to go so Obama's house. I wasn't that thrilled on it, since I'm not a huge fan and i could really careless about where he used to live.

But as a group we all decided that we didn't have anything better we wanted to do so we hopped on the subway and jetted out of the city. I knew we were in trouble when our surrounding started looking...well....really run down! I verified with Aaron that the area we were going to was nice and he said " Of course. Obama's house is over a million dollars. Do you think he is going to live in the projects?" I had to admit he had a good point, but somewhere from the back of my mind I vaguely remembered hearing that one of the reason's Obama was so loved was because he came back to the place he grew up and wanted to "build" it back up.

Needless to say once we made our stop and exited the train. I knew we were in trouble. this was not the place four white, OC housewives and husbands with a child, should be. Right away I told Aaron that i was not walking down the street. I was going to catch the next train back. He however, kept on pushing me to go. We got into a small elevator to go down a level but failed to get it to work. Of course the doors closed but the elevator didn't move. After two times of having the doors close behind me and feeling "stuck", I jump out and said " I'll take the stairs, thank you!

Everyone followed but Jen and I never left the station! Once I got down to the main street level, I knew there was NO way I was walking out onto the street. Aaron was very upset but i didn't care. I asked the security guard how long it would take for us to walk to Obama's house and he said it was fifteen blocks. NOPE I was not going to do that! Three of us turned around and caught the train back while Aaron forged on ahead.

I called him every few minutes to make sure he hadn't been jumped! He made it fine, but was not able to actually see the house. The cops had the streets blocked off! As we waited for his return, we grabbed some lunch. With each bite I took of my "Chicago" pizza I was sooooo thankful I had not gone to the house.

There are just certain places I should not be and Harlem and Wabash is one of those places!!

Kristen

Fun, Fun & More Fun!

2009-09-18T21:15:00.001-07:00

We are having a blast here! This morning we walked down the the famous Navy Pier and rented some bikes. We followed a map that took us around the shoreline to many different points of interest. Keeping up with Aaron was a little difficult but other than that it was a great ride. By the end of the ride, everyone was exhausted, (especially when we realized that we had bike over 10 miles!)
After another great meal (I had the best tomato soup), we caught a boat for a tour of the city from the river. Thank you for the idea by the way Jocelyn! It was an awesome way to see the city.

We just came back to our hotel room after a wonderful dinner of steak, mashed potatoes, asparagus and BANANA CREAM PIE! i am soooo stuffed! I have vowed to eat very little tomorrow! We will see how that goes.....

I got good reports from home, but just read on facebook that one of the girls pooped in the spa and then got into the fireplace! UGH! Sorry Michelle! got to stay on top of those crazy girls!
,
Kristen

Chicago!!!

2009-09-17T21:35:00.000-07:00

Aaron and i are in the wonderful city Chicago! We are here for the Steelers/Bears game on Sunday. Our flight here was uneventful, however, I did hurt my foot somehow yesterday and I have been limping around the city all day! I hope it's better tomorrow :(

Tomorrow we are going to go on a bike ride around lake Michigan and then a boat tour of the city. I am very excited to be able to spend one and one time with Aaron. Our really good friends the Macs are here as well. Total coincidence that we are here at the same time. We had a lovely candle light dinner of mouth watering Italian food. I loved the thin crust pizza I ordered!

My amazing sister Michelle is at home with all our kids! I can't believe that she says yes each time we ask her! Luckily my mother is helping her out and the girls have school tomorrow so at least she will get a little break!

Before I go I want to pose a question. Do you ever have the right to butt into someone parenting? Especially a stranger?

Last night I took the kids to Disneyland and while I was packing the car up to go home I pulled the girls stroller back behind my car. I grabbed Marie and placed her in the car seat, while keeping an eye of McKenzie who was still in the stroller. As I was placing Marie in the car ,a man , probably in his thirties rolled up behind my car. He started to pass me and then we made eye contact and he reversed his car and rolled down the window.

I was expecting for him to ask if I was leaving when to my surprise he said " Do you know you have a baby in that stroller?" Now normally I might have said something funny, but after three hours at Disneyland with the kids, I was in no mood! So while giving him the "evil" eye I said " Yes, I do know there is a child in the stroller".

He seemed shocked by my "attitude" and shook his head as he drove off in disgust. I watched him in wonderment shocked that he felt so strongly about the situation that he had actually had said something? Would i have done the same thing If the situation was reversed? Probably not! I hate people saying stuff like that to me. What do you think?

Kristen

The Power of Music....

2009-09-16T12:57:00.000-07:00

On Sunday I gave a lesson to the Young Women on how to control our thoughts. Music came up as a huge influence. Because of the lesson, my mind is been on music and how much it influences an individual. I've realized how powerful it can be for both good or evil. Music sets the mood for everything. It controls what we think about. Often we can rationalize "bad" music by saying it is "back round noise". I've even heard some say, " I just like the beat, i don't listen to the words".

But even if we don't "hear" the words, our unconscious mind can still hear them right?? This morning as I was flipping through radio stations, I came across a song that I really like but is a bit questionable. I tried to rationalize the song because even though it talks about "Your sex is on Fire", what harm is it to me?? I can have sex!! I'm not a teenager trying to stay chaste in that area.

I listened to half of the song until I couldn't talk myself out of it anymore. Why should I have a different standard for myself than I do for our youth. Shouldn't we be striving live worthy to be their examples? Feeling guilty I switched to song and found a song I loved even more.

But to my dismay all day I have had the other song in my mind. The chorus just keeps replaying again and again !! Ugh!! I've learned my lesson. If I have questions about a song, I'm just moving on to the next one right away.

Kristen
p.s Ummm... it is on FIRE by the way! :)

Changing Seasons....

2009-09-15T12:57:00.001-07:00

Today I can almost feel Fall just around the corner. It is by far my most favorite season! I took the girls to the park today with my sister Michelle and it was so wonderful to be able to play outside and not get sweaty from the heat! Garments and Summer weather do NOT mix well!

With the change in the weather getting closer I am already anticipating the many seasonal parties, crisp cool air, orange and red leafs, rain storms, baking treats, fall clothing, snow boarding, etc. Isn't it wonderful that the earth brings change with it. It seems like by the time a certain season rolls around, I am sooo ready for the change! Funny, how in my daily life a part of my craves change while the other part wants to soak in every minute with my kids.

As I watched the girls play at the park, I had such a sense of fulfillment come over me. I love them SO much and yet they can drive me to the brink of insanity. Yesterday, Maire was in my face ALL day saying "Ba ba" (bottle). I literally gave her probably five bottles of milk and by the early evening she was still begging for more! By six o'clock I lost it. I was trying to clean the house for a dinner with our friends and the missionaries. As I started to mop the floor, Maire started in again, McKenzie was crying about something else and Tyler had the T.V volume on full blast. As my nerves began to rattle I tried to tune everything out but when Maire grabbed a cup full of water off the table and spilt it all over the floor, I LOST it!

I took the mop and slammed it onto the ground, ( of course breaking it!) . In an instant the room got quite as my children looked at me and tried to assess the situation. Feeling terrible about losing my temper, I took everyone into the playroom, put on a movie and locked the door behind me.

I knew i needed a few moments to myself. Luckily once everyone got to the house for dinner I was feeling a little bit better! So again I wonder, I can something so wonderful as Motherhood be so hard at the same time??

I guess what it comes right down too, Anything worth while is going to take a lot of hard work.

Kristen

Pain....a common bond

2009-09-14T12:20:00.000-07:00

This morning I was able to help out in Tyler's classroom. I LOVE his new teacher. I've heard she is just as forgetful and disorganized as I am. Great! Now when I forget one of the million's of papers that will come home this year, I won't feel like such an idiot! I heard that she forgets that you've even given her the papers! We are going to make quite a pair!

While spending time with her this morning, the subject of infertility came up. This is something I am very used too since having twins often sparks this topic. I was surprised to find out that like me she struggled for years to conceive until she finally adopted two beautiful children. The instant I heard her story I felt a kinship to her. She didn't have to describe the pain and heartache that she had gone through....I was well acquainted with it.

It reminded me that now matter who we are we've all been touched with sorrow and that when we find someone who has walked that path as well, there is a bond that no one else can understand.

This is one of the big reason I am writing my book "multiply and Replenish". When I was struggling with infertility, though there was many wonderful books on the subject, I never found one dealing specifically with being L.D.S and dealing with it. In the L.D.S world, our culture is so different from the outside world. Families are so important to us. I wanted someone to tell me how they got through the doubts in faith, prayer, the Lords will , etc. I never did find one, hence, that is why I decided to write it! Thankfully I'm only a few months away from being done. I have the best proof reader right now who is helping me out so much! (you know who you are)

I hope that through my hard earned lessons, I can soften the tears of those who are currently living through one of the darkest times.

Pain is a natural part of life,but it's nice that no matter what we go through...most likely someone as been there before. Let us all lend a hand to lift those who need it!

Kristen

A Single Mother for the Weekend....

2009-09-13T18:10:00.000-07:00

I survived the whole weekend without a husband!!! In fact, it wasn't that bad at all. Usually when Aaron goes out of town the girls get sick and the days are miserable. I think this is the first time that no one got sick, I slept good at night and never once did I feel overwhelmed with doing it ALL by myself. I'm so proud of myself!

Now that everyone is in school our days are running so much better. I actually have time to "think". Of course now that Aaron is home I am putting him on full "Daddy Duty"! I even saved to dirty diapers for him to change tonight. Sure the girls had to "sit" in it for about fifteen minutes until Aaron came home, but I figured that my shift was over and if they don't mind, then I wasn't going to worry about it. Horrible I know! Hey, I never said I was a perfect mother!

We had two baby blessing today and for a moment I thought about having another child. Every now and then this thought will cross my mind but soon I come to my senses. No way can I handle another child right now! I'm just starting to find my way again. It has made me wonder , How does one know they are finally done having children?? Is it one of those things that you just know? Is the desire gone? Or do you just make the decision on what you think you can handle as a mother?

My head hopes I am done but every now and then my heart questions it......

Kristen

Is Motherhood the end all and be all???

2009-09-11T12:27:00.000-07:00

In the church Motherhood is very sacred! We know that the world has a very different few. As L.D.S women we have to find a balance. How do we become great mother while not "losing" our sense of self??

In my opinion I think that following your own dreams and goals as a daughter of God only make you a better mother. We teach our young Woman to value themselves , to work on their "individual worth",to get their education, improve " life" skills, so why do many forget to do all that once a baby comes?

A close friend and I discussed this topic today. As mothers we both feel that fulfilling yourself also fulfils the lives those around you. I remember when I wanted to go back to school and Aaron didn't really see the point. That is until my own mother pointed out that having an education would only benefit my children.

Our daughters have to be so strong in today's world. They need to not only be spiritually strong but have skills that can help them through out their life. We don't know what life is going to spring on us, divorce, death of a spouse, loss of income. We need to prepare for anything. I love that the leaders of the church are starting to really push this idea.

I've been going to school for over eight years now and i LOVE it! No i haven't received my degree yet, ( i take only one class a semester) but I know that I will and I KNOW that it has helped me keep my identity. I am not "just" the mother of my children. I am a woman who has many different qualities to her. It is one of my goals in life to never lose a sense of myself.

I know one day my kids will be gone and i don't want to be walking around an empty house wondering who the heck I am!

Yes, being a mother is the most important thing I will EVER do, but I'm glad it's not the ONLY thing I do!

Kristen

A Housewife's Job is NEVER done....

2009-09-10T12:18:00.000-07:00

So I've been thinking lately about how no matter how many times i pick up the house, it is a disaster by the end of the day! My sister-in-law and i just had this conversation. As a mom if you take even a afternoon off from picking up, the house ends up looking like a bomb went off!

Unlucky for me I live with a clean FREAK! Bless his heart but things like little hand prints on windows and mirrors drive him crazy. Um....if i let things like that get under my skin I would most definitely lose what is left of my mind. Still i feel that i keep a very clean home! NO it is not perfect and yes, you shouldn't open a certain closet of mine! But give me a break I've got two , two year olds that can destroy a room within seconds!

Now I'll admit I am terrible at laundry!! I've even bought my husband more garments just so that I can wait a little longer before i have to do the whites! Why do I hate laundry so much??? It's really not that difficult to do. I mean, it's not like I'm living on the frontier washing my clothing by hand and than hang drying them. All I have to do is put the clothes in the washer then the dryer , fold and put away!

So again I ask myself what is the big deal with doing laundry?? After eleven years of marriage i haven't figured it out yet. I must have some "deep rooted" feelings about laundry:) But I still keep trying to get better.

A load a day, keeps the laundry Blues away!!
Kristen

First day of school Blues.....

2009-09-09T11:45:00.000-07:00

This morning while I was doing my dreaded morning run on the treadmill, I tuned into the "View". One of the co-host spoke about how hard it was leave her four year old child at preschool. The women started to discuss how it can be so hard and that the first day of school is often filled with tears. Not from the child, but the parent.

So as I dropped my girls off to their first day of preschool I pondered if the fact that i was excited and relieved to have a few hours to myself made me a "bad" mother??? Even with Tyler, I never cried!! Not even for a second!

Who are these mother 's that are crying?? I don't think its bad in anyway...but I wonder what makes one mom cry and the other do "cartwheels" out the door??

Girls had a great time! No bad reports from teacher which I am sooo thankful for. Let's up this is a start to a great year for them!

Kristen

What to do when all H*ll break loose...

2009-09-08T10:00:00.000-07:00

The day started out wonderful. I got up early to make breakfast for the first day of school. Tyler got up and took a shower without me having to drag him out of bed. We had breakfast, scripture study, I got to exercises before nine am and the girls were in a great mood .

So what went wrong??? I am hiding in my bedroom as I type this listening to the twins having a total melt down. Over what I have no idea. One minute I was cleaning the kitchen after breakfast while telling them we were going to get ready to go to the grocery store and the next minute Maire starts screaming at McKenzie. Then McKenzie screams back and so on and so on. I knew i needed a "time out" when I started to scream at them!

Now as I listen to them fight and wrestle....hopefully soon to work it out...I am trying to figure out why on earth girls are so dramatic??? The world does not have to end just because a toy was taken away!!

For the moment they have calmed down a bit but I better come out of hiding because i think McKenzie just slapped Maire...at least that's what it just sounded like.

So pray for me today!!!! I feel that I am going to need all the strength I can get until they start school tomorrow!!!

Home Sweet Home...

2009-09-07T09:01:00.001-07:00

It's great to be back in Sunny southern California! We drove through the night hoping (again) that the girls would sleep...really who were we fooling??? They only slept for about an hour the whole trip! I knew it was a lost cause when it was 2 am and they were still up. So from now on we will do road trips during the day.

Thankfully, no one got car sick, but we were prepared for anything! We had two changes of clothes for each girl and a bunch of groceries bags handy to catch vomit! We learned are lesson!

Tomorrow is the first day of school for Tyler and I am sooo ready. Of course this means that now I have to start getting up early in the morning but it will be worth it. I'm sooo tired of trying to think of fun things for him to do! My brain is officially fried.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Labor Day!

PS: McKenzie has not bitten Maire for three whole days!!!! Yeah!!!

Wonderful Utah....

2009-09-05T16:53:00.000-07:00

Utah is one of my favorite places to visit! The air smells clean, the mountains are magical and the changing weather keeps me on my toes. We are up here for Swiss Days. There is a huge festival that goes on for two days with many things creative, handmade items to buy but the best part is the pancake breakfast. For a small fee, you are given two of the biggest pancakes I've ever seen, (they actually fall over the edges of your plate) smothered with butter and syrup ,two fried eggs, and two pieces of grilled ham. Not to mention all the other food that is available at your finger tips, warm gooey brownies, fried bread topped with honey or jam, all kinds of homemade cookies, Carmel apples that crunch with every bite...my list could go on and on!

The celebration of Swiss days also includes a parade put on by the locals. It is mostly older people marching up and down the main street but the kids love it because of the handful after handfuls of candy that is thrown at them.

I was proud of myself for not spending very much money. Just some new bows and church shoes for the girls.

I have to give a special shout out to my wonderful husband who took the girls the rest of the afternoon so I could hang out with my mom, sister and mother - in -law. It was a wonderful day and I' m sad that we must leave tomorrow. I will miss Utah....maybe one day I'll be able to talk Aaron into "living" up here.....or at least getting a second home up here....though who knows when that could happen!

The summer is offically over and I am a little sad to see it go, though I am ready for the cool crisp air that comes with fall, the best season of all!

Utah or Barf...

2009-09-04T22:35:00.000-07:00

What a trip we had getting up here. We decided to drive during the night hoping the girls would sleep all the way up. Uh...How wrong we were. First of all , we didn't get on the road until 1o pm and by the time we had made it to Victorville, Maire got car sick and vomited all over herself and Tyler, who in turn almost hurled as well. Also we had a full car with me, husband, kids and both of my parents who we stuffed in the way back (sorry mom and dad).

By the time we pulled over and got Maire cleaned up we had a feeling that maybe we should just turn around. But we love punishment so we decided to push on. Thing calmed down around 1 am when the girls FINALLY fell asleep. Though they would wake up every twenty-minutes and cry. I think the bad shocks on the car was waking them up. Driving in that car was like being on the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland. (we got new tires today! )

Around 7:30 we were twenty mins. away from Provo when Maire vomited again....this time it was worse. So after pulling over and cleaning her up , we again went on our merry way. We also bought some air freshener since the car stunk!

Around 8:00 we dropped my now very tired parents off at my aunts house and before heading up the canyon to my in-laws house, we decided to hunt down some food. We were all starving. Needless to say that took us a while to do, not much was open. While hunting for food, McKenzie suddenly vomited all over herself. By now we knew the routine well : pull over, undress child, wipe child down, wipe car seat , take dirty clothing and blankets and stuff into the trunk.

By the time we found food, we decided to not give anything to the girls. We were not taking any chances. But we weren't so lucky, for just as we were about to enter the canyon, McKenzie vomited again. I turned around in my seat to help catch some of the vomit with a tee- shirt and to my horror she projected vomit so far that some landed in my MOUTH.! For an instant I thought for sure I was going to lose it! I started to scream, Aaron screamed at me to catch the vomit and then had to slam on his brakes which in turn made me lose my balance, slam into the passenger door and break our handle off!!

Let me just say I think from now on we will be flying to Utah!!!

Get a Job or go insane?

2009-09-03T18:50:00.000-07:00

Today was such a terrible day that I actually started thinking about going back to work ! I just don't know if I'm going to make it with out losing my mind! I wanted to just sit down and cry at least three times today. The girls just don't get along at ALL! They fight and cry about everything! After a crazy morning I finally separated them. McKenzie in the playroom and Maire watching a movie. It gave me a half hour of peace. That was until McKenzie escaped!

There was one bright spot in our day. Aaron and i got to take the girls to the Yo Gabbagabba set! So much fun! The girls just loved seeing the characters in "real life". Tyler thought is was pretty cool to. Thanks to my brother in-law who is one of the creators of the show for giving us the grand tour.

So my fellow readers....um all one of you :) I will be away for the weekend and will not be posting. We are taking a family trip....the last of the summer as school finally starts on Tuesday. (I couldn't be more excited) Here's hoping that I survive this trip! Have a great Labor Day weekend.

Kristen

Why must I force my kids into having fun?

2009-09-02T14:31:00.000-07:00

Summer is almost over and I decided to head out to the Spectrum in Irvine to give the kids one last chance to play in the water fountains there. Of course it took me twenty minutes just to convince them that we were going somewhere fun. Tyler was upset that he couldn't spend ALL day playing his video games and the girls just wanted to go in the pool.

However, I was determined that we were going to get out the house since we did not yesterday. After basically tackling the girls to the ground to dress them and begging my son to be happy, we finally were on our way. As I drove I started to have a sick feeling in my stomach that maybe I should have just stayed home. I mean, why go through all this trouble if they want to stay home? Problem is, when we do stay home, they fight the whole time and destroy the house!!!

In the end it ended up being a great afternoon. The girls had a blast eating pizza, playing in the water and chasing the birds. Tyler took a while to warm up to the idea of having "fun", (crazy kid) but once he changed his attitude for the better, I saw that old familiar smile that just melts my heart.

Just a side note: I am on full biting alert! McKenzie bit Maire three times yesterday and already once today. Poor Maire has bite marks all over her body and McKenzie is spending her day's in the time out chair! Lets just hope she doesn't get kicked out of preschool. Oh......please....don't get kicked out of school!!!

Motherhood is all about surviving the storm. I know one day soon these crazy days will be a distant memory....

Down time!

2009-09-01T15:32:00.000-07:00

So I figure the best time for me to write is in the late afternoon when the girls go down for a nap....though it's been fifteen minutes and I can still hear them talking to each other! I hope they go to sleep. I need a least an hour of "mommy time" to get through the rest of the day.

This morning Tyler asked for cinnamon rolls and since i didn't have any of the store bought ones I decided to make them by hand. I got creative. Instead of the white flour I used whole wheat flour. Plus when I went to go make the glaze I realized I was all out of powder sugar. As I scrimmaged through my cupboards looking for something I could use for a glaze I had the "bright" idea to melt butter and chocolate and drizzle it over the rolls. I have to say that they turned out pretty good and the best part was that the house smelled GREAT! I wish I had the energy to bake every day! It's not that i don't like cooking, I just HATE cleaning up the mess!

For the few of you who know that I'm writing a book, I 'd like to inform you that I am only days away from being finished with the final edit! I'm so excited. This book has taken me two years to write since I've rewritten it twice! A writer is never pleased with her work!! The book is going to be discussing my journey with Infertility and how difficult that was. However, it is not written in Memoir form. It is written as a novel. Here is just an excerpt from the first page:

The day was July 2oth, 2007. I awoke from yet another night of consistent tossing and turning. Sleep seemed to be an unattainable goal for me these days. I was now thirty-seven weeks pregnant with twin girls and very uncomfortable. Actually uncomfortable was an understatement. I was miserable. I had never before faced such physical adversity. The moment my eyes popped open, I sensed the something was wrong.....

Stay tuned for more....

Who knew?

2009-08-31T16:24:00.001-07:00

Who knew that life with twins was going to be so wonderful and painful at the same time? Now that my twin girls have turned two, I am really starting to lose my mind! The fighting and the screaming at the top of their lungs is in full swing. But just when I feel like I'm going to strangle them, i get those perfect smiles. Nothing warms my heart than seeing them grin from ear to ear. Today so far has been a good day. I only had to clean up poop from the floor once and the only food thrown on the ground was a cup of dry cereal! It's the wet messes that are the worst.

We actually made it out to target today to shop for my eldest sons school supplies! Thank heavens for another school year! The girls did really well. I just stuffed them with popcorn and Slurpee's. Even though at the last dr. appt, they were concerned about McKenzie weight, I didn't feel even on ounce of guilt giving the junk food. Listen I have things I've got to do and if they are not eating something while I shop- then it's not going to happen. Last time we went shopping without food, Marie grabbed a bottle of red wine and mashed it on the ground! so McKenzie has a little belly. I'll just make sure you starts running with me when she older.

I hope that those who read this blog find it funny and inspiring. My life is one big crazy mess but I do love it. Stay tuned for more updates!

Kristen